Eastport’s Sweltering 4th of July Parade, 2013

Another American Independence Day has come and gone, and that means I was down in Eastport, wandering around with my family, seeing the spattering of attractions, the kids wasting money on inflatable rides.  This year wasn’t as exciting as the last few years, and it was hot.  Not only was it in the 90’s, but the streets were all freshly paved, so it was an oven.

Now, the parade was also kind of lacking this year, but I’ll do my now traditional recap.  Here’s how it went:

We kicked things off this year with a long line of municipal and State vehicles—fire trucks, police cars, ambulances.

“Oh, gimme gimme gimme!”  Nothing says American Independence like plastic garlands made in China.

The honor guard comes marching along.

 Returning from the dark dungeons of Augusta are State Representative Joyce Maker and State Senator, Dave Burns; just to the right of Big Bird.

It’s Chris Gardner’s 1952 Chevy Styleline Deluxe, driven by the man, himself.  And who’s that in the passenger seat?  It’s former State Senator Kevin Raye!

 The first wave of bagpipers come along, from Oromocto, New Brunswick.

 

Then the “Wreaths Across America” folks come along.  They do a good thing, supplying free wreaths to veterans.

The coast guard boat came, but it wasn’t sporting the machinegun this year.  A shame.

And the little ford rambled right along...

"The Boss."

The Shriners' lobster boats chugged on by.

And behind them we had the second band of bagpipers.  Blow them bags, boys!

I’m not sure who this guy is, but he was walking along behind the bagpipers as if he were somebody important.

The Quoddy Bay Lobster float.

A steady flow of kid beauty queens came along, as always.

Barbara’s International School of Dance had a float, and a few dancers behind it, but they didn’t have nearly the showing of past years.

Shead High School—Eastport’s premiere institution of teen education.

These Canadian Air Cadets made an appearance, yet there were no Mounties to be seen.  Strange.  Maybe they couldn’t get past the border guards this year.  Seriously, I think it’s harder coming across our northern border these days than it is coming across from Mexico...

The Shriner trucks zigzagged their way down the line.

“Oh, my God!  Get it off, get it off!”

Saint Mary’s Band was playing “God Bless America” as they rolled on by.

The Colonel’s back in town.

More beauty pageant girls were paraded out for all the lecherous old men to gawk at.  Oh, am I cynical or what?

Oh, isn’t that clever.  The “knot” OK Corral.  Where’s Knotty (Naughty) Wyatt Earp?

A John Deere Dragster. You don’t see one of those every day.

Shriner Minibikes.  They were really zipping along.

It’s Bozzuto’s big rig!  It’s a parade beast, but would it kill them to paste a flag on the side of it, or even some nice bunting?

It’s the Inkas Wasi guy.  He plays some neat Paruvian pipe music, and has a bunch of CD’s you can buy.  From Baroque to modern Rock songs, he does pipe versions of it all!

Shead High School’s class of 1963.  Those were the days...

It’s the Robbinston Grange float.  I joined the Grange not so long ago, and I could have been on the float, but then who’d give you all a recap of the parade?  Besides, nobody called to remind me, or let me know what was going on.

The Shriners came along in their little old cars.  It’s Fez country!

Atlantic Clarion Steel Band clanging away, as usual.  You can count on them to show up for the 4th in Eastport!

More Shriners, screaming right along.

The First is my bank, and they did a clever “First Ladies” float.

Olson Auto advertising the Roaring 20’s Ball at the Eastport Arts Center.  That could be interesting, considering the book I’m currently writing takes place in the 1920s.  Who am I kidding?  I never go to anything...

The National Guard brought out a few vehicles.  Would it have killed them to mount a .50 cal on the flatbed?

“I hear you’re taking volunteers.”

Moose Island Trolley Tours, right on schedule.

Eastport+Gilligan’s Island.  Not sure I can see the parallels.

Cornerstone Baptist Church float.

When September rolls around, we’ll have the annual Pirate Festival.  I’ve never gone, but heard nothing but good things.

“Dude, I’m, like, the coolest pirate ever.”

Lusty pirate wenches!

And that brings us to the end of the parade.  There were a lot of things missing this year, one being that we didn’t have a Navy ship in port.  There was some kind of scheduling snafu, where work was being performed on the breakwater, and they couldn’t have things shipshape in-port on time.  So, we didn’t have the long parade of white uniforms on the route.  It was just an off year, I guess.  Let’s hope we see more in 2014!

Two For Tuesday #1

We're 6 weeks away from the official release of "Quests, Curses, & Vengeance," and that means we've got to start stirring up some interest in this massive collection.  From now until the official release, each Tuesday will feature two opening paragraphs from two different stories in the anthology.  Will this help people make an informed buying decision, as it tempts them to read more?  We can only hope!

First up are the first two paragraphs from "Burn It Up, Burn It Down," by Philip Overby:

It’s always a shame that I have to burn things to get what I want. But simplistic minds only deal in simplistic deeds. I am a dragon, therefore I must kill them. That’s all they understand. I can’t simply say “I’m looking for someone.” They get out pitchforks, spew obscenities, or throw buckets of urine at me. I’m not sure what they think throwing urine on me does other than piss me off.

I burn because they push me. I don't enjoy it one bit.

And for our second pair of paragraphs, we have "Ashes to Ashes" by Shawn Cook:

In the end, the only thing left was dust. It coated the sidewalks and covered the windows of the lonely, cold buildings. Piles of dust sat in unmade beds and on cracked leather car seats while the dying sun made slower trips across the sky. The dead oceans of the world slowed their tides and began to stagnate as a thick scum covered the lethargic waves.

There were no soft breezes or tree shaking winds to cross the surface of the world, and all things green began to wither and die. For the first time in countless millennia, the world was utterly silent. No animals called in the night and no insects made their presence known in the day. Nothing avian sped through the sky, nothing reptile slithered and clawed across the ground.

Two strong openers to far disparate tales in the same collection.  Be sure to visit the Quests, Curses, & Vengeance listing at Martinus.us to learn more and pre-order this excellent collection.

Quests, Curses, & Vengeance reaches final editing phase

It's already July, and the final round of edits on the next Martinus Publishing anthology are underway.  This is a major undertaking, considering the collection is nearly 150,000 words and 407 pages in length. This is a real behemoth, and readers are bound to get more bang for their buck!

Speaking of bucks, now is the time to reserve your copy of this upcoming anthology.  If you're a fan of Sci-Fi & Fantasy, you won't want to miss out on the chance to read this one.  It has something for everyone.

* Coming August 15, 2013! * Pre-order Special: $12.00 Free Shipping in the USA!

For US customers, pre-ordering is easy.  Just click the paypal button and place your order. It's only $12.00, and that includes the shipping.  Also keep in mind that this is the first "royalty paying" anthology Martinus Publishing is releasing, and nearly 60% of the profits go to the writers.  Buying this book will make every contributing writer happy, so be sure to spread the word and get this market hopping.  Martinus Publishing is proud to support our writers as best we can, but we can only do that if people buy the books.

Tag Lines:  New to the QCV description page at the Martinus website are a bunch of tag lines for the 32 different stories.  If you're curious about the subject matter of this anthology, head over there and read about them.

Well, that's all the time I have today.  I'd better get back to editing this massive collection, so it can be ready for release on August 15, 2013!

Terror of the Vacuum Leak

Tuesday brought me a most unpleasant surprise.  My 1956 Ford Fairlane left me stranded in Calais, about 11 miles from home.  It was a most sudden and unpredicted experience, and of course it happened on the hottest day of the year (thus far), and when I had my wife and 3 of my 4 children along for the ride.

Pulling out of Hospital Lane onto South Street, the engine went dead.  As soon as I gave it gas, nothing.  It rolled to a stop in the wrong lane, and I was fortunate to have nobody coming down the road toward me.  That gave us time to push the thing back out of the way before traffic flowed.  An older gentleman then stopped and further helped us push it down the road and into the driveway of a now vacant house; that little green one across from Palmer Street with the boat painted on the garage.

 

The 1956 Ford Fairlane after its triumphant return.

Once we were out of the way, my wife went to call for help.  While I sat with my 3 daughters in the car, I did a quick exam of the engine.  I had first thought it was the fuel pump, but checking the carburetor I found it was certainly getting gas.  I tried the ignition again, and it actually started, but the engine was really rough.  I turned the car around and waited for the tow truck.  Once we were back home, I checked my second suspect; the old vacuum lines.  There are 3 of them, and after a quick inspection the problem became clear.  They were goners.



Rotten hose, split off the carb!



The hunks of hose appeared to be original, putting their age at 57+ years old.  Two of them were in really rough shape, and the primary vacuum advance hose was split right off of the carburetor.  I'd noticed the car was getting sluggish at times, and that explained why.  Tuesday's heat must have been the final straw that made them get so bad the car wouldn't even run.

Fortunately, I still had a fresh hunk of vacuum hose from the old wiper motor I had to scrap.  You see, I'd bought a brand new hose for the vacuum wipers last summer while I was still trying to  get them working, but since the old motor had refused to cooperate, I replaced it with an electric model.  So, I had this nice hunk of hose lying around that came in real handy.  I replaced all 3 vacuum hoses, and what a difference.  Without a vacuum leak, the car is back to running right.  It's something I should have done a while ago, and I wouldn't have had to pay a towing charge.

Vacuum leaks are the bane of old engines, and a few dollars worth of hose can make all the difference.

Roses –by The Cranberries (Album Review)

It's been too long since I put new material on the blog, so I'll take a few minutes to review the latest album by The Cranberries, a band I enjoyed in my youth.  I started listening to them with their second album, No Need to Argue (which remains their best album, in my opinion), and I kept listening straight until their "last" album in the early 2000's.

A few weeks ago, I was perusing music on Amazon.com, just to see what was out there after many years of not buying much new, and lo and behold the Cranberries put out a new album in 2012, their first in over a decade.  Well, I couldn't let that pass without a listen, so I bought the digital MP3 version and had at it.

"Roses" is a good warm-up comeback album, something reminiscent of their earliest material, and a potential stepping-stone toward future hits.

This album has a lot of songs I'd classify as okay, but only a couple that stand out to me.  "Conduct," the first song on the album, is my personal favorite of the collection, while "Waiting in Walthamstow" is a haunting melody which seems eerily familiar (though I can't tell what it reminds me of).  "Tomorrow" is reminiscent of one of their earliest hits, "Dreams," and the others should satisfy those familiar with the Cranberries song stylings.

So, how does this album compare to their earlier works?  I'd say it is their best overall album since No Need to Argue, but it lacks a major hit.  As I said, there are a few songs that I really like, but nothing really jumps out at me as a single.  "Show Me" had real potential, and listening to the first forty-five seconds for the first time I was expecting it to be that stand-out song, but the chorus just fell short.  It seemed to be building up to something that could have been a real head-banger, but it didn't.

I'd put this as a solid 3-star album; definitely worth buying for Cranberries fans.

A Long Overdue Update

It has been far too long since I posted on the blog, so here is a brief update about my current writing/editing activities.

Martinus Publishing is currently taking submissions for 3 anthologies, and several more are in the planning stages.  The "Quests, Curses, & Vengeance" anthology will be coming out in August, and I'll be doing the final round of edits on the stories therein once the various authors get their final drafts in to me (right now, about half of the final versions have been received, and the rest should be in by the end of June).

With warm weather comes other work for me, so reading slush has slowed a bit.  That's not to say I couldn't rush through the slush, but I don't think that would be fair to the writers involved.  When I'm reading stories for anthologies, I do it when I can truly give those stories the attention they deserve.  If I'm too fatigued to give them my full attention, I set them aside for another time.  This weekend, I have 8 stories on tap, and I hope to find some publishable gems!

Meanwhile, The Temporal Element will be making an appearance at the American Library Association's annual convention in Chicago next month.  Hopefully, someone will take notice.  The many talented authors in that collection are worthy of real praise and publicity (not to mention the need for Martinus Publishing to be noticed).

My own writing has slowed lately, but I can report that work has resumed on "Unforsaken," the 4th book in the West of the Warlock series.  This is good news for those of you who have already enjoyed the first two volumes in the series.  I hope to release the 3rd book, "The Man Who Shot Thomas Edison," sometime next winter.

That's all for now.  As we get closer to the publication date of Quests, Curses, & Vengeance, I have some promotional specials planned, including an exciting book giveaway!  We'll also have a new shootout writing contest coming up later this year, for talented authors seeking to test their mettle.

Amazon Comedy Pilots

Last week, I got one of those Amazon emails that draw your attention to some special feature or offer they have.  In this instance, they were asking for people to view and review their new comedy tv show pilots, and since it was free I thought, why not?  So, over a few days, I took the time to look at the eight pilots, and gave my opinion on seven of them.  I'll now take a moment to go over my impression of each proposed series.

Before giving my assessments, I will say that I am very surprised that every single pilot has received more 5-star reviews than non-5-star reviews.  Even the best of these shows only rated 4 stars in my book, and I honestly can't tell what people are basing their votes on.  Are they really that easily entertained, that they think this stuff is the best of the best?  Or are they just so eager to pump up a few select shows that they're inflating their vote?  I think the latter is probably true.

Also, note that most of these shows have a lot of cursing in them.  It seems the writers went wild with f-bombs and the like, since these aren't on the air yet.  If any of these shows went on network tv, they'd just edit that out, I guess.  You have been warned.

Now, on with my three cents worth on each of the series.

Alpha House:  This one was weak satire, which did little more than make fun of Republicans.  The humor wasn't my cup of tea, and I think a more balanced approach would have made this a more promising pilot.  I could see this running half a season (at most), but by then even the Bill Maher fans will get bored with the clichéd jokes and stereotyped characters.  John Goodman's renown would be the only thing that could make this thing stay afloat for more than a few episodes.  A 2-star effort.

Betas:  A comedy for computer geeks.  The humor in this one was more subtle and serious.  To be fair, this show seems more suited to being a 1-hour drama program, rather than a comedy.  The first ten minutes or so were very dull for me, but after that it really picked up, and I started to get a fondness for the characters (except that mid 30's washed-up stoner guy).  This also has a brief shot of a naked lady in it, but the stoner guy was just chatting to some online hooker, so I guess that's okay (not).  I think if this was expanded to the hour (aka 40-45 minute) format, we'd have more time for character development, and thus the show would be able to flourish.  3-stars, with room to grow.

Browsers:  Comedy + musical?  This is the one show I couldn't get through.  The musical numbers just threw me off, and prevented me from enjoying the show.  It's a novel idea, but I wouldn't watch it.  No star-rating given, since I couldn't even get through the show to review the whole episode.

Dark Minions:  An animated comedy which was only half made.  They use that stop-motion animation technique, and I guess the creators didn't want to waste time making an entire episode until they had a contract for a full series.  However, what's there is intriguing.  It's a sci-fi comedy that could devolve into the next Futurama, or flourish as an animated cross between Family Guy and Red Dwarf, with some Douglas Adams thrown in.  In its present form, it seems a bit juvenile, and the drug usage is a little stupid. (I never got the idea of dope in space, how is that funny?)  The characters were a bit two-dimensional.  3-stars.

Onion News Empire:  A parody of the mainstream media, this one was fair and balanced.  There are some really funny moments, and bit of character development, and a few really outrageous elements tossed in.  Of all the Amazon pilots, this one felt the most professional, in my opinion.  It also had a lot of really good talent, most notable in my book being William Sadler (is he really that fat these days, or is that just a costume?).  I gave this one 4-stars.

Supanatural:  This one is a parody of the supernatural/horror/Ancient Aliens genre.  The main characters really grated on my nerves; a couple of divas with bad attitudes who work in a mall and on the side save the world from the paranormal.  The storyline was amusing, and the evil doomsday skull really stole the show.  If they spent some time making the ladies more likeable, this could fit in with the growing number of adult animated series, but in its present form it only rates 3-stars.

Those Who Can't:  A cynical comedy about High School teachers, which has a bit more truth than fiction to it.  Yes, there are obvious exaggerations, and the comedy is sometimes over the top, but it is almost believable at times.  The hippy-like principal is a nice touch, as well.  I give this one a 4-star rating, it being my 2nd favorite of the bunch.

Zombieland:  The series picks up where the movie left off, only with a new cast and less humor.  This felt like a really weak attempt to recreate something that has already been done, and it gets old really fast.  When it comes down to it, this just wasn't all that funny, and it has nowhere to go but down.  Zombies just aren't funny enough to sustain an entire series.  That, and the new actors can't compete with the big-name movie stars who defined their roles (really, who could ever replace Woody Harrelson?).  A weak 2-stars.  I almost want my half hour back for watching this one.  Unless you're a die-hard zombie fan, don't waste your time here.

Okay, so that pretty much sums it up.  Amazon also has five kid show pilots, but I didn't watch those, since I'm not really into that stuff (even though I have 4 young children).  Now it's your turn.  Go over to Amazon and watch a few of the shows there.  See what you think.

Check out all of the Amazon comedy pilots here.

Madison Rising's "The Star Spangled Banner"

A few weeks ago, I ran across a link on facebook to a hard-rock youtube video of The Star Spangled Banner by Madison Rising.  While I'm generally more of a moderate rock kind of guy, this new version of America's national anthem appealed to me.  Now, for some inexplicable reason, facebook has been deleting the link to the video from people's walls.  Accusations of censorship are running rampant.  It's probably just the work of a few disgruntled facebook employees who don't like the video for whatever reason, but some people say it's a concerted effort at censorship.  All I know is, the video link I shared on my wall vanished recently, just as it has from many other people's walls.

Check out the music video here.

You'll see there is nothing offensive, pornographic, or otherwise ban-worthy in this video.  Your 5 year old could watch this and hear the song without any ill effects.  It's a very patriotic American message.

I reposted the link on my profile page today.  We'll see how long it stays there this time.  Feel free to share it on your fb walls, as well.  It's worth a listen.

VFW: The Cover Revealed!

Over the weekend, I had the opportunity to commission a few new pieces of artwork for forthcoming Martinus Publishing anthologies.  One of those pieces is for the VFW: Veterans of the Future Wars anthology, which is a collection of military sci-fi stories.  So, let's get right to it.  Here is the artwork for the VFW anthology, illustrated by Mark Vatsel (check out his portfolio here):

The submission period for VFW: Veterans of the Future Wars is still in full swing.  Spread the word, and send in your own military sci-fi story for consideration!

2 New Anthologies from Martinus Publishing

It's barely May, but Martinus Publishing is gearing up for a new set of anthologies that will be opening for submissions in the fall.  There are a number of really great ideas still being bandied about, but there are two certain collections that will be assembled:

To Hell with Dante: A Cynical Afterlife Anthology— From evil men getting what they deserve, to super-villains facing their fate, and your run-of-the-mill demon facing the day, To Hell with Dante! seeks to feature cynical stories about the dark side of the afterlife.  Face your fears with a little farce and a touch of justice.  Is Hell a magical realm, or a bureaucratic morass?  Stretch your preconceptions, and explore the wacky world of the damned!

We Were Heroes: A Super-Powered Anthology—A collection all about super-powered individuals in their waning years.  Retired crime-fighters with special talents and technology, crusading vigilantes who find their bodies failing, and old warriors passing the torch to the next generation; this anthology will show us what life is like for these people as they get old.  Go beyond their heyday, and show what these legendary heroes will become.

There are currently 3 Martinus Publishing Anthologies accepting submissions:  VFW: Veterans of the Future Wars, Altered America, and Life of the Dead.  Once these anthologies begin to fill up (and I have more time to read for other collections), then you can expect To Hell With Dante and We Were Heroes to hit the scene.  Submissions will likely open sometime in September.  There are a few other concepts still on the drawing board, so keep your eyes open for even more from Martinus Publishing in the coming months.

Quests, Curses, & Vengeance Line-Up (+Hit of the Month)

It's the first of the month, so you know what that means.  It's time for May's "Hit of the Month" free story!  Head on over to Martinus Publishing's Hit of the Month page and read Curse of the Bottle by Nye Joell Hardy.  This is the first free sample story from the forthcoming Quests, Curses, & Vengeance anthology.

I am also pleased to announce the Table of Contents for QCV.  The final publishing contracts have come in, so all of these stories are now officially a part of the collection, even though many of them are still in the editing phase:

The Quest:

1:  Burn It Up, Burn It Down –by Philip Overby

2: Quest through the Ages –by J. L. Mo

3: Hooked on Questing –by Gerald Costlow

4: El Dorado –by Mel Obedoza

5:  Project Hellguard –by A.C. Hall

6:  Life or Death –by Stacey Jaine McIntosh

7: Odin's Spear –by Susan A. Royal

8:  A Bridge Too Near –by Martin T. Ingham

9: Ashes to Ashes –by Shawn Cook

10: More Precious than Rubies –by Chris Allinotte

11: All That Glitters –by Edmund Wells

12:  All in a Day's Work –by Karl G. Rich

Curses:

13: Family Curse –by Gerald Costlow

14: Exiled –by Stacey Jaine McIntosh

15: Wipeout –by A. C. Hall

16: Gold Fever –by Bruno Lombardi

17: The Dance of Five Hells –by Philip Overby

18: The Long Night –by Shawn Cook

19: Are You Worthy? –by Edmund Wells

20: Curse of the Bottle –by Nye Joell Hardy

21: Curses May Not Be Returned, Refunded, or Exchanged –by Lauren A. Forry

22: Sometimes You Get the Curse, Sometimes the Curse Gets... –by Karl G. Rich

Vengeance:

23:  Poetic Justice –by Edmund Wells

24   Abducted –by Shawn Cook

25: Morríghan –by Stacey Jaine McIntosh

26: Be Careful What You Wish For... –by Mel Obedoza

27: Ashtown –by A. C. Hall

28: Red Paint –by Philip Overby

29:  Revenge, Inc. –by Nye Joell Hardy

30: But I Know We'll Meet Again Some Sunny Day –by Lauren A. Forry

31: Digging Up The Past –by Gerald Costlow

32: Vengeance Is Mine, Sayeth Me –by Karl G. Rich

As you can see, the book will be partitioned into 3 distinct parts, to fit the three themes.  It will be one thrilling set of stories.