A Long Overdue Update

It has been far too long since I posted on the blog, so here is a brief update about my current writing/editing activities.

Martinus Publishing is currently taking submissions for 3 anthologies, and several more are in the planning stages.  The "Quests, Curses, & Vengeance" anthology will be coming out in August, and I'll be doing the final round of edits on the stories therein once the various authors get their final drafts in to me (right now, about half of the final versions have been received, and the rest should be in by the end of June).

With warm weather comes other work for me, so reading slush has slowed a bit.  That's not to say I couldn't rush through the slush, but I don't think that would be fair to the writers involved.  When I'm reading stories for anthologies, I do it when I can truly give those stories the attention they deserve.  If I'm too fatigued to give them my full attention, I set them aside for another time.  This weekend, I have 8 stories on tap, and I hope to find some publishable gems!

Meanwhile, The Temporal Element will be making an appearance at the American Library Association's annual convention in Chicago next month.  Hopefully, someone will take notice.  The many talented authors in that collection are worthy of real praise and publicity (not to mention the need for Martinus Publishing to be noticed).

My own writing has slowed lately, but I can report that work has resumed on "Unforsaken," the 4th book in the West of the Warlock series.  This is good news for those of you who have already enjoyed the first two volumes in the series.  I hope to release the 3rd book, "The Man Who Shot Thomas Edison," sometime next winter.

That's all for now.  As we get closer to the publication date of Quests, Curses, & Vengeance, I have some promotional specials planned, including an exciting book giveaway!  We'll also have a new shootout writing contest coming up later this year, for talented authors seeking to test their mettle.

Amazon Comedy Pilots

Last week, I got one of those Amazon emails that draw your attention to some special feature or offer they have.  In this instance, they were asking for people to view and review their new comedy tv show pilots, and since it was free I thought, why not?  So, over a few days, I took the time to look at the eight pilots, and gave my opinion on seven of them.  I'll now take a moment to go over my impression of each proposed series.

Before giving my assessments, I will say that I am very surprised that every single pilot has received more 5-star reviews than non-5-star reviews.  Even the best of these shows only rated 4 stars in my book, and I honestly can't tell what people are basing their votes on.  Are they really that easily entertained, that they think this stuff is the best of the best?  Or are they just so eager to pump up a few select shows that they're inflating their vote?  I think the latter is probably true.

Also, note that most of these shows have a lot of cursing in them.  It seems the writers went wild with f-bombs and the like, since these aren't on the air yet.  If any of these shows went on network tv, they'd just edit that out, I guess.  You have been warned.

Now, on with my three cents worth on each of the series.

Alpha House:  This one was weak satire, which did little more than make fun of Republicans.  The humor wasn't my cup of tea, and I think a more balanced approach would have made this a more promising pilot.  I could see this running half a season (at most), but by then even the Bill Maher fans will get bored with the clichéd jokes and stereotyped characters.  John Goodman's renown would be the only thing that could make this thing stay afloat for more than a few episodes.  A 2-star effort.

Betas:  A comedy for computer geeks.  The humor in this one was more subtle and serious.  To be fair, this show seems more suited to being a 1-hour drama program, rather than a comedy.  The first ten minutes or so were very dull for me, but after that it really picked up, and I started to get a fondness for the characters (except that mid 30's washed-up stoner guy).  This also has a brief shot of a naked lady in it, but the stoner guy was just chatting to some online hooker, so I guess that's okay (not).  I think if this was expanded to the hour (aka 40-45 minute) format, we'd have more time for character development, and thus the show would be able to flourish.  3-stars, with room to grow.

Browsers:  Comedy + musical?  This is the one show I couldn't get through.  The musical numbers just threw me off, and prevented me from enjoying the show.  It's a novel idea, but I wouldn't watch it.  No star-rating given, since I couldn't even get through the show to review the whole episode.

Dark Minions:  An animated comedy which was only half made.  They use that stop-motion animation technique, and I guess the creators didn't want to waste time making an entire episode until they had a contract for a full series.  However, what's there is intriguing.  It's a sci-fi comedy that could devolve into the next Futurama, or flourish as an animated cross between Family Guy and Red Dwarf, with some Douglas Adams thrown in.  In its present form, it seems a bit juvenile, and the drug usage is a little stupid. (I never got the idea of dope in space, how is that funny?)  The characters were a bit two-dimensional.  3-stars.

Onion News Empire:  A parody of the mainstream media, this one was fair and balanced.  There are some really funny moments, and bit of character development, and a few really outrageous elements tossed in.  Of all the Amazon pilots, this one felt the most professional, in my opinion.  It also had a lot of really good talent, most notable in my book being William Sadler (is he really that fat these days, or is that just a costume?).  I gave this one 4-stars.

Supanatural:  This one is a parody of the supernatural/horror/Ancient Aliens genre.  The main characters really grated on my nerves; a couple of divas with bad attitudes who work in a mall and on the side save the world from the paranormal.  The storyline was amusing, and the evil doomsday skull really stole the show.  If they spent some time making the ladies more likeable, this could fit in with the growing number of adult animated series, but in its present form it only rates 3-stars.

Those Who Can't:  A cynical comedy about High School teachers, which has a bit more truth than fiction to it.  Yes, there are obvious exaggerations, and the comedy is sometimes over the top, but it is almost believable at times.  The hippy-like principal is a nice touch, as well.  I give this one a 4-star rating, it being my 2nd favorite of the bunch.

Zombieland:  The series picks up where the movie left off, only with a new cast and less humor.  This felt like a really weak attempt to recreate something that has already been done, and it gets old really fast.  When it comes down to it, this just wasn't all that funny, and it has nowhere to go but down.  Zombies just aren't funny enough to sustain an entire series.  That, and the new actors can't compete with the big-name movie stars who defined their roles (really, who could ever replace Woody Harrelson?).  A weak 2-stars.  I almost want my half hour back for watching this one.  Unless you're a die-hard zombie fan, don't waste your time here.

Okay, so that pretty much sums it up.  Amazon also has five kid show pilots, but I didn't watch those, since I'm not really into that stuff (even though I have 4 young children).  Now it's your turn.  Go over to Amazon and watch a few of the shows there.  See what you think.

Check out all of the Amazon comedy pilots here.

Madison Rising's "The Star Spangled Banner"

A few weeks ago, I ran across a link on facebook to a hard-rock youtube video of The Star Spangled Banner by Madison Rising.  While I'm generally more of a moderate rock kind of guy, this new version of America's national anthem appealed to me.  Now, for some inexplicable reason, facebook has been deleting the link to the video from people's walls.  Accusations of censorship are running rampant.  It's probably just the work of a few disgruntled facebook employees who don't like the video for whatever reason, but some people say it's a concerted effort at censorship.  All I know is, the video link I shared on my wall vanished recently, just as it has from many other people's walls.

Check out the music video here.

You'll see there is nothing offensive, pornographic, or otherwise ban-worthy in this video.  Your 5 year old could watch this and hear the song without any ill effects.  It's a very patriotic American message.

I reposted the link on my profile page today.  We'll see how long it stays there this time.  Feel free to share it on your fb walls, as well.  It's worth a listen.

VFW: The Cover Revealed!

Over the weekend, I had the opportunity to commission a few new pieces of artwork for forthcoming Martinus Publishing anthologies.  One of those pieces is for the VFW: Veterans of the Future Wars anthology, which is a collection of military sci-fi stories.  So, let's get right to it.  Here is the artwork for the VFW anthology, illustrated by Mark Vatsel (check out his portfolio here):

The submission period for VFW: Veterans of the Future Wars is still in full swing.  Spread the word, and send in your own military sci-fi story for consideration!

2 New Anthologies from Martinus Publishing

It's barely May, but Martinus Publishing is gearing up for a new set of anthologies that will be opening for submissions in the fall.  There are a number of really great ideas still being bandied about, but there are two certain collections that will be assembled:

To Hell with Dante: A Cynical Afterlife Anthology— From evil men getting what they deserve, to super-villains facing their fate, and your run-of-the-mill demon facing the day, To Hell with Dante! seeks to feature cynical stories about the dark side of the afterlife.  Face your fears with a little farce and a touch of justice.  Is Hell a magical realm, or a bureaucratic morass?  Stretch your preconceptions, and explore the wacky world of the damned!

We Were Heroes: A Super-Powered Anthology—A collection all about super-powered individuals in their waning years.  Retired crime-fighters with special talents and technology, crusading vigilantes who find their bodies failing, and old warriors passing the torch to the next generation; this anthology will show us what life is like for these people as they get old.  Go beyond their heyday, and show what these legendary heroes will become.

There are currently 3 Martinus Publishing Anthologies accepting submissions:  VFW: Veterans of the Future Wars, Altered America, and Life of the Dead.  Once these anthologies begin to fill up (and I have more time to read for other collections), then you can expect To Hell With Dante and We Were Heroes to hit the scene.  Submissions will likely open sometime in September.  There are a few other concepts still on the drawing board, so keep your eyes open for even more from Martinus Publishing in the coming months.

Quests, Curses, & Vengeance Line-Up (+Hit of the Month)

It's the first of the month, so you know what that means.  It's time for May's "Hit of the Month" free story!  Head on over to Martinus Publishing's Hit of the Month page and read Curse of the Bottle by Nye Joell Hardy.  This is the first free sample story from the forthcoming Quests, Curses, & Vengeance anthology.

I am also pleased to announce the Table of Contents for QCV.  The final publishing contracts have come in, so all of these stories are now officially a part of the collection, even though many of them are still in the editing phase:

The Quest:

1:  Burn It Up, Burn It Down –by Philip Overby

2: Quest through the Ages –by J. L. Mo

3: Hooked on Questing –by Gerald Costlow

4: El Dorado –by Mel Obedoza

5:  Project Hellguard –by A.C. Hall

6:  Life or Death –by Stacey Jaine McIntosh

7: Odin's Spear –by Susan A. Royal

8:  A Bridge Too Near –by Martin T. Ingham

9: Ashes to Ashes –by Shawn Cook

10: More Precious than Rubies –by Chris Allinotte

11: All That Glitters –by Edmund Wells

12:  All in a Day's Work –by Karl G. Rich

Curses:

13: Family Curse –by Gerald Costlow

14: Exiled –by Stacey Jaine McIntosh

15: Wipeout –by A. C. Hall

16: Gold Fever –by Bruno Lombardi

17: The Dance of Five Hells –by Philip Overby

18: The Long Night –by Shawn Cook

19: Are You Worthy? –by Edmund Wells

20: Curse of the Bottle –by Nye Joell Hardy

21: Curses May Not Be Returned, Refunded, or Exchanged –by Lauren A. Forry

22: Sometimes You Get the Curse, Sometimes the Curse Gets... –by Karl G. Rich

Vengeance:

23:  Poetic Justice –by Edmund Wells

24   Abducted –by Shawn Cook

25: Morríghan –by Stacey Jaine McIntosh

26: Be Careful What You Wish For... –by Mel Obedoza

27: Ashtown –by A. C. Hall

28: Red Paint –by Philip Overby

29:  Revenge, Inc. –by Nye Joell Hardy

30: But I Know We'll Meet Again Some Sunny Day –by Lauren A. Forry

31: Digging Up The Past –by Gerald Costlow

32: Vengeance Is Mine, Sayeth Me –by Karl G. Rich

As you can see, the book will be partitioned into 3 distinct parts, to fit the three themes.  It will be one thrilling set of stories.

Zealous About Zee Anthology!

Okay, maybe it's a bit of a cheat, but there aren't any concrete rules about the A to Z challenge.  So, "zealous" is the word of the day to wrap things up.  I'm sure some of the contributors to "Quests, Curses, & Vengeance" are "zealous" about having their stories published, and I am zealous about publishing them.  This is a great little collection, and in a few days I hope to announce the table of contents.

This is going to be a large anthology, and while some of the stories are pretty much publishable at present, a number of them are going to need some serious editing.  Of course, that is often the case with short stories that are rushed into production and written in a single week.  Some authors work at different paces, and things in our lives often prevent us from working on a story as much as we'd like to in a limited timeframe.  Still, there are some really creative items just waiting to be perfected.

There is a lot to be zealous about with this book.  Each author will be getting a cut of the proceeds, and assuming everything works out we'll have it on store shelves sometime in August.  The pre-order won't be up and running for a while, as I won't know the final production cost (and necessary mark-up) until the revised stories are on-hand.  Still, with any luck, we'll have a pre-order special available in July.

As a special sneak peek, I'll leave you with this raw back-cover art, which compliments the front cover.  Both pieces are by the talented C. D. Muller.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some work to do.

Yesterday's Fantasy (Poem)

For quite a while, I had a feature called "Minstrel Mondays," where I would share a poem or set of song lyrics of my own creation.  That feature has gone by the wayside for the most part, because I don't think there's a huge interest in my poetry.  I used to write a lot of them when I was younger, though they never got me anywhere.

Today I present a little poem I put together back in 2006, which may have some meaning for you.

Sticky day

that I'm feeling,

of things that flow around

me, unending passion

never realized,

forgotten with age,

fallen from the tree

of knowledge, we seek

something we'll never get.

Yet out of it all

we find some meaning

that was never meant

to be.

I can't see your face

anymore, that's why I

try to feel my own.

It's not what I remember,

this sanctimonious me,

the eyes that stare back

are somebody without a

care of what I want.

I forgot myself in the

haze of tomorrow's reality.

I'm happier in yesterday's fantasy.

Xevious

X is probably the toughest letter in the alphabet for the A to Z challenge.  There just aren't that many X words that make a good topic.  Fortunately, I can fall back on my childhood and bring up that old video game, Xevious.

I must have been about 5 when my parents bought me an Atari 7800, a very primitive video game system.  One of the half dozen games I got with it was Xevious, which sucked up many happy hours.  I actually preferred Galaga, but Xevious was fine for a change of pace.

Over the years, I've played various old video games, though the ancient Atari games haven't really piqued my interest.  I can honestly say I grew out of them, and to be fair I haven't really played any games for months.  Video games are losing their allure, as I find my time shrinking with different projects and responsibilities.  Maybe, someday, I'll feel the urge to pick up a controller again, but for now I'll leave that to my kids, who still have some time to waste.

What We Want

This is a philosophical question that has been discussed and ruminated over since the dawn of time, and it is one that pertains to the very nature of human existence.  What we want is something that everyone asks themselves on occasion.  But the answer, if there is to be one, can only be truly answered in paradox.  Take the weather, for instance.  People are always complaining about it.  "It's too cold."  "It's too hot."  "It's raining outside."  "It's too sunny."  Whatever the weather is, there is something to dissatisfy us, and this is the way it is with many aspects of our lives.  To put it simply, we always want things to be the way they aren't.

It is a curious quirk of human nature, to never be satisfied or content with what we've got.  That instinct is responsible for everything good and bad about our way of life.  It is the reason great inventors create new devices.  It is the seed of discord that causes people to fight and kill one another.  It is the reason we are always trying to get more, and change the world to suit us.  Without this drive, without the sense of dissatisfaction with the world around us, we would not be able to survive, for we would be without purpose.

This eternal drive to make things "different" may make some of us vain or destructive, but it is the very basis of our existence.  Without the drive, we would never have crawled out of the jungles and caves to build civilization.  Without this desire moving forward, we will be condemned to devolve and plummet into a new dark age.  Really, it is when we are comfortable and satisfied that we are doing nothing, and allowing things to go to hell.  Just look at the fall of any great civilization.  When they get fat and comfortable, things collapse.  Being annoyed or frustrated is the motivation which leads to advancement and construction.  Being satisfied is what leads us to apathy and entropy.

So, the next time you are upset that the weather isn't good, or you're angry about something you don't have, or frustrated that your life isn't what you'd like it to be, feel grateful for this driving force.  It means you are alive, and not just sitting around and waiting to die.  Be happy that you're discontent; then go do something constructive about it.

Vintage Movie Rewatch

Wednesday afternoon, I had the chance to watch Beverly Hills Cop for the first time in a very long time. I think I was about 6 the last time I saw it (yes, my parents let me watch some very questionable movies). Of course, back then I didn't pay much attention to it, as I was too young to really appreciate it. Maybe that was for the best. Either way, I didn't really remember much about it after twenty-seven years, so it was like watching it for the first time.

The dvd was in the $5 bin at Walmart a couple of months ago, so I've had this thing sitting on my desk for quite a while. With all the writing, editing, and watching Lost, I didn't have time for an old movie. I finally got around to it yesterday. I had a headache from spring cleaning, and the fog knocked out my apparently-crappy Hughesnet internet connection, so I had nothing better to do (or maybe I just needed a break). On a sidebar, I'd like to say I'm pretty disappointed that my fancy, new satellite internet goes out anytime it is cloudy or damp outside. This is pretty shoddy service considering what I'm paying.

Moving on, I found Beverly Hills Cop to be a fairly entertaining movie. It's a fairly average movie for the mid-eighties, and didn't have anything that stands out to make it great. It was a cheap thrill movie with some of Eddie Murphy's classic comedy, a lot of swearing, and some pretty bloodless violence (a guy gets shot in the back of the head and he doesn't even bleed—the camera angle helps to cover it, but still). We see Ronnie Cox in a non-villain role (pre-Robocop, I think he always played some kind of good guy). And we see Judge Reinhold in a somewhat familiar "dorky-guy" role.

It's interesting to watch a vintage movie like this, as there's a certain sense of nostalgia behind it. You have the classic eighties soundtrack, glances at the techno-plastic fashions of the era, and altogether you have something that would be considered "low budget" today, even though it probably cost quite a bit in its day. It's worth watching for a few laughs and an entertaining, albeit unrealistic, plotline. Hey, it's worth it just to see Eddie Murphy shoving bananas up a tail pipe (seriously).

Utz

For the "u" post in the A to Z challenge, I'll briefly mention this snack food company.  Utz produces some very tasty junk food, and my personal favorite is their Maui Barbecue kettle-cooked potato chips, though they have all but disappeared in recent months.  That seems to be the way it goes for all the best stuff out there; you just can't get it in downeast Maine.  The scarcity of Vanilla Coke comes to mind, and I still can't find a single can of Hires root beer.  The best things seem to be unavailable in my vicinity.

Utz produces a lot of other great snacks, too.  Their pretzels are particularly good, and their other varieties of kettle cooked chips aren't bad, either.  Pick up a bag sometime.

Visit the Utz website.

Teaching Again

Monday morning, I had the pleasure of once again teaching a writing course at Washington Academy, one of the oldest and most prestigious High Schools in the United States.  Last year, I also taught "The Mysteries and Trials of Freelance Writing" during their "Artsfest" in April, and it was a great experience.  This year, it was all freshman in the class, a small group of attentive and talented pupils.  They handled the material well, came up with some great ideas during the different writing phases of the course, and I hope they came away with some useful knowledge that they'll be able to apply in the future.

During the course, I introduced them to the fundamental concepts of marketing fiction.  They wrote brief story plots, query letters, and received tips and tricks of the trade that I've learned through trial and error over the years.  Of course, we didn't have a lot of time to draft fresh material, but considering they only had 20 minutes or so for their plots and query letters, they were quite excellent.  Over time, when they have time, I expect they'll be capable of mastering the art of the submission process.

George S. Counts
Renouned Educator

Whenever I teach one of these courses, I get a taste of what could have been.  Though it's always a little nerve-wracking, and I tend to be nervous, there is a certain thrill to teaching a course.  If I did it every day, I imagine it would be second nature.  I suppose I inherited that from my father's side of the family, where teaching is practically the family business (many thanks to my great-grandfather, George Sylvester Counts).

It's not often that I get the opportunity to share my wealth of knowledge with receptive students.  The experience is always welcome.